My mind is numb from questions, my heart is weak from frailty, and my body is tired from running. What can a man ask from a God of eternal possibilities? What can a person learn about a God that is beyond our reality? I look to this world and see impossibilities; I see an unchangeable certainty. We all live in a restricted life limited by what we perceive. Our intellect has been tainted by a world that says one thing, and yet we cannot see beyond where we stand. We struggle to break free from the chains that bind us, seeking for the key that is in His hands. Struggling harder and harder until the intensity breaks us out of our will. But as we fall to the floor in desperation, we land on our knees to a holy God. But how can we fall into humbleness if we cannot see the weakness in our hearts? We call out for a Savior as we constantly attempt to save ourselves from the death that inevitably will take our life. Our pride holds us close, tormenting us with answers it can never give, laughing at our misguided efforts of self-righteousness. While God looks from above, awaiting the time we trade our strength for His. We fail to ask for what we cannot possibly conceive, help from an all powerful healer. We embrace our wounds, we hold them near to our hearts as a sense of the faith that we traded for pity. “Maybe empathy will lead us out of our arrogance?” But it only leads to more despair. But God is patient, unmovable. After we trade one sin after another, the end will inevitably come to bring us to the place that He needs us. But where will it lead us? Will it lead to the end, or the beginning? We fear the conclusion, for the story of our lives will end. Our entire being, our existence will conclude with nothing more than a The End but no happily ever after. Terror fills our minds, trembling, but the trembling gives way to a peace. The whisper of a still, soft voice proclaiming that He is with us, He is there to take us through. We do not need to fear God for what He has done for us, but we do need to fear God for what we do not allow Him to do. He is our strength, God alone. He is our fortress, there to protect us. He is our deliverer, saving us from a life we cannot live. And when we allow God to protect us with His hands, whom shall we fear?
Back in Tennessee, just after I became a Christian, I attended a funeral that seemed off to me. I don't remember who the person was or why I was there, which is weird, but I do remember that this person did claim to be a Christian. As the service started and people began to speak about him, I noticed that most of the people around him were not. When his friends came to to speak they would say things like "I guess he had some kind of belief in God, which we disagreed on, but he was a good guy." The leader of the church would give the generic verses in most TV and movie funerals, then that was it. I left feeling empty. A little more recently, yet so far away, I went to a funeral of an older man from our local church. They were singing for joy and talking about how he was with Jesus now and his suffering was all over. It was a celebration! We sang and worshiped just like it was a church service. I enjoyed that funeral more, but still left a little empty. I mean, there was ve...
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